Sexual Intimacy & Family

If you would have asked me to discuss this topic a week ago, I would've turned you down immediately. However, I think that my view points have changed drastically in the last five days. I always thought that discussing sexual intimacy or sometimes even using the word sex was inappropriate and kind of almost sinning. But I have learned from multiple sources that that is not actually the case. In fact, at this age, (I am 18), it is healthy to talk about it openly. I also now believe that it is healthy to talk about this kind of stuff to all ages, to a certain extent of course. So I think I am going to tell you my story with coming to understand the importance of sexual intimacy and why it is actually crucial to our well being and health as far as discussing the topic goes.
Let's start from the beginning, fifth grade. We had to watch the video. I vaguely remember part of me being nervous and curious, while the other part was just kind of disgusted. Ya know, just learning about periods just kind of freaked me out. I think my mother tried to teach me that that was something I should look forward to because it is really a miracle how our bodies work, but I was surrounded by friends and people in my school who thought it was gross and almost disappointing when that time of the month came around. In school, I observed that it was just completely embarrassing. Something that was almost to be ashamed for. You didn't want anybody to know you were menstruating because then they would just make fun of you. Because of those experiences, I wouldn't open up to my mom about my feelings with all the new changes going on with my body. I drew a line with my mom. I didn't open up to her as much about my feelings that I started to try to handle it all by myself. I definitely think that that is where are started thinking that talking about our bodies and the sexual side of things was a big no no.
In high school, I was still very hesitant to share my feelings and questions about how to handle emotions and tendencies. I feel like I just had it ingrained in my head that even questioning what was happening with my body was inappropriate. It also became difficult for me to understand what was okay. In church, we always discussed how to NOT break the law of chastity. I was never taught how to LIVE the law of chastity. I felt confused, not knowing what was okay or not, and even when I didn't even do anything, wondering why my body felt the way it did. Still, I kept it all in. I didn't talk to my parents even though I was feeling so conflicted about the topic.
It wasn't until my family relations class when I realized it was okay to discuss. For an assignment, my professor had our class watch an interview with a sex therapist. She discussed that some people have what is called "Good Girl Syndrome". She continued to explain that it is basically when a person believes that even discussing sex is bad and something that should never be done. She continued by saying that talking about the topic is actually crucial to our human needs because we need to understand it and what it is actually there for. I realized that I definitely had some of this good girl syndrome, and that I should confide in my mom about the questions I have had for so long. So naturally, I called my mom right away and we had an amazing conversation about it. I now understand that discussing sexual intimacy is so so important. Sex is not bad, but it is something that should only be done in the bonds of marriage. Feelings and passions are not bad, as long as they are bridled and controlled. Our bodies are a gift from God. We should treat them as such, and continue to follow what God has commanded us. As we do so, we will understand more deeply the blessings that He has given us, even that of sexual intimacy and the sacredness of it.